Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
