your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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