So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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