He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
