My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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