Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
