I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
