he wants to bone in the snuggie
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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