I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize