Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Omg I joined a choir last night...
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals