so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
