But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
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