Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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