Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
