dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
