So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
