You work out of a Hotel?
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Randomize
