Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
How does one acquire holy water?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
