hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize