Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize