if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
