home. puking in laundry basket.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
