Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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