he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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