North Korea, Best Korea!
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
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