I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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