Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize