she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
