You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
