i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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