It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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