people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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