Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
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She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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