They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize