just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
