Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
