Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
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