is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
