chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
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