I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Well I just put wine in my tea
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
