before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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