he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
