Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize