No awkward lesbian experiences without me
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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