how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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