Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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