Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
