Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
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