I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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