so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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